It's Personal

Mom, “You’ve got to get Wi-Fi.”

“I don’t need Wi-Fi.  I’m online just fine.”

“But you can only work in here, or drag a cord along with you.”  (I was seated at the drafting table in my activity room.   Never would the room be called an office.  It was a place where I handled many interests and projects, not of an ‘office’ ilk.  It was my ‘activity room’.)

“Darin, it doesn’t matter.  The laptop’s easy to carry; the cord does fine.  I don’t need the confusion of Wi-Fi.   I’ll keep things simple.”

He let me do my thing for perhaps a year or more, until July 29^th, 2011.  That Friday evening I answered the front door bell chime for Darin to practically push in, announcing, “I’ve come to hook you up to Wi-Fi."  He had been at his office all day.  He looked pale.  He looked tired.  His wife and daughters stood behind him with their apologetic “we couldn’t stop him, he’s determined” look.

Darin with a NETGEAR box under his arm rushed back to my activity room.

I’ve had constant, wonderful Wi-Fi since that evening.

With thanksgiving for his life, I’ve written to celebrate

my son on today’s 54th anniversary of his birth.

    

                                           John Darin Stith

                      December 2, 1961 – September 14, 2011

Be Considerate

I hurried my shopping cart to the express check out – still shopping, adding a small bag of Corn Curls and a packet of chewing gum conveniently displayed to get my attention.  

Having completed my pre-Thanksgiving shopping several days ago, this particular day, I walked into Stop and Shop for 3 items, yet I had many more in my basket. Moving everything onto the conveyer belt, it seemed I might have more than the Express Lanes 12 item limit. I admitted as much to the cashier who pleasantly responded with a shrugged, “don’t worry, you’re fine."

 I had three more than the limit.  “My impulse shopping got out of control,” I apologized, hopeful those waiting behind me were okay with it.  They were.

 The cashier softly complained about shoppers being impatient and mean.  “It’s not necessary.”  

My thinking, she may be right but we all need to practice being considerate of others.  Express lane anxiety is understandable.   You’ve dashed to the store to buy a few things, planning to get in and get out.  When a self-absorbed person, cart overloaded for that lane, tramples on your expectations, it isn’t easy to ignore.

 “People have stuff going on,” I wanted to say but didn’t.  We don’t know the burden another carries.    That thought has impressed me since the time I realized my driving slowly, barely at the speed limit, heading to work one morning seemed as if I had no regard for others trying to get to work.  Drivers accelerated and passed, giving me dirty looks. 

But, I was dealing with a personal issue that had wrecked my world.  My son, a teenager, was hospitalized with a sickle cell crisis and pneumonia that kept him in intensive care.  He had stabilized and I decided I could go into my office for a few hours.  Darin and his recovery were heavy on my mind.  The anxious drivers broke me out of my selfish mindset.  But they didn’t know my troubles.

That’s when the realization touched my mind that I had been like that many times, at least feeling as angry as those drivers looked and acted. Someone unnecessarily impeded my progress.  My attitude let them know.  Not good. 

I could do better.  In the future I would remember I didn’t have to add to another person’s stress, whether family, friend or stranger. 

It’s important to be considerate of others

Thanksgiving 2015

"Yesterday was great.

Here’s table getting dressed

(Fruit bowl to be ‘Xed’)

Thanksgiving menu needs space.

Table set; we took our seats

Family gracious; family thankful

Head bowed; each proclaimed it.

Dinner was fabulous!

Dishes plentiful; 

Food delicious.

Hunger vanquished; 

Tummies filled,

Not one could do as eyesight willed.

Dessert pies and cake would wait,

Each of us had to recuperate.

Coffee time this morning was great."

                                                                  - m.l.stith

Woman Confused

“She’s ready to play.

Letter promised sent on its way.

Today she’s through,

There’s nothing she must do.

Yet never can relish,

Being stress-free.

For the intense volunteer,

It’s out-of-the ordinary.

A mound of laundry

Hidden from view

Her bathroom floor

Needs mopped too.

The staircase carpet,

No longer brilliant blue.

Her concern is brief, 
Yes, sadly true.

Ancient divorcee’, single parent,  

Retired many years – fit, vibrant,

Career success a stored memory.

Offspring, grands - grown, gone, busy,

Her life now screams she’s free.

Choices, options, what to do?

Agony she tells me.

Weird.  How say you?”

                         -  m. l. stith

A SCARY NIGHT REVISITED

It's that night three years ago as I waited, all alone, for Hurricane Sandy; a repost.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

It's So EERIE - Hurricane Sandy is Here!

(As I begin writing this it is around 9 pm on Monday night, October 29, 2012.  I'll post when I get where there is electrical power.)

I’m sitting here in the dark listening to the vicious, scary wind and my battery-operated radio.  They’ve reported water is rising to higher and higher levels in lower Manhattan.  Water is gushing into the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel – unbelievable information.  I mean, it is totally unfathomable that such is actually happening, “looks like a water fall rushing into the tunnel” the news broadcaster said.

They report over a million people in New Jersey are without power.  I am one of them.

Wind gusts have exceeded the 75 mph we were told would lambast us.

Yes, Sandy came and the hurricane, unfortunately, has not fallen short of what was promised.  This disastrous weather event took some 65 lives in the Caribbean before heading north to scare me to death tonight. 

It’s reputation preceded its coming but I was ready.

Sunday on the way home from church I stopped at the market for a few items, primarily prepared mustard which I discovered I didn't have after shopping earlier in the week.  While there I picked up munching food, cheese, fresh fruit, and nuts.   

Earlier today as the wind velocity only hinted at what was to come, the lawn furniture was put in the garage.  The garbage can and all flowerpots were secured behind closed doors.  I brought my car outof the garage just incase of a power outage affecting the garage door opener.  The wind activity picked up.

Photo taken this morning- no danger.

An hour or so later a tree limb whipped out of the huge sycamore tree in my back yard and slammed onto the new fence, damaging it. I called my daughter and told her I was going out to take a picture before removing the limb.  She insisted, “Mom, stay inside!”  Reluctantly I did.

Sometime after 4 pm I was comfortable on my couch, talking on the telephone sharing the unique weather information with friends and family, some live in the area of the storm and some did not.  I was fine.   That feeling would not last.  I fell apart, lost confidence in me, my situation, and in the condition of my health.

As I write this, I’m once again feeling fine.  I’ve overcome thinking I might have a heart attack.  Yes, all at once I became terrified by the wind slamming through the trees, against the house, and insistently rattling windows and doors.  Why would I fall apart emotionally when I hadn’t been frightened at all listening to TV’s news and weather people who obviously spoke with urgency designed to incite listeners to action.  I was calm through all their hysterical warnings.  After all, my house, built in 1910 is a sturdy structure as old homes are when they are well built and well taken care of.  I felt secure and sheltered in the center of the home, which is free of windows.  Fright did not overtake my sensibilities until around dusk when the lights began to flicker.  Then I lost it.   My left arm ached. I found myself gasping for breath. I panicked to the point that I scurried to get a couple aspirins into my system.  “Please don’t have a heart attack,” I pleaded to me as I gulped down a glass of water.

My anxiety continued.  I needed a strong drink!   Would alcohol after the aspirin be dangerous to my health?  A quick telephone call to a sensible friend gave me courage to enjoy a rum and coke.  My emotional state improved significantly.

Of course Super Storm Sandy (evolved from Hurricane Sandy) would proceed to put many people in New Jersey and New York City in horrible situations.  My problems amounted to nothing, compared to others.

It is now the ‘day after’.  The sun shone brightly and I took my car out and found the means to upload this post. 

Shortly,  I’ll head back through streets without traffic lights to my dark home in a city that is essentially totally dark.  The latest report is there are now 2,300,000 people in New Jersey without power.  It is estimated we will be inconvenienced for several more days.  I have flashlights, the radio and an ice-packed cooler preserving foods that require such.  There was no damage to my home.

For all the angst I experienced, I’m thinking, I have been truly blessed throughout this ordeal.

May you and yours be well.